The holiday season is often a time of connection, joy, and celebration — but for many, it also brings with it a familiar discomfort: unsolicited comments about our bodies. Whether it’s a family member commenting on your weight, an old friend making remarks about your appearance, or someone offering advice about your health, body comments can be hard to navigate. These remarks can feel intrusive, triggering, and sometimes even hurtful, especially when you’ve worked hard to cultivate body trust and acceptance.
So, how can you approach these situations with grace, compassion, and clarity? Here’s a guide for how to handle body comments during the holidays while staying grounded in your own worth and boundaries.
Your body is yours, and you get to decide who gets to comment on it — and under what circumstances. People might feel entitled to make comments about your weight, appearance, or eating habits, but that doesn’t mean you have to accept or engage in those conversations.
Boundaries are a form of self-respect, and they help you protect your emotional wellbeing. When someone comments on your body in a way that doesn’t feel supportive, it’s entirely okay to draw the line and say, “I’m not comfortable discussing my body,” or, “I’d rather focus on something else right now.” Boundaries don’t have to be confrontational; they can be clear, direct, and grounded in your own sense of self-worth.
While you can’t always predict when body comments will arise, it’s helpful to have a few go-to responses ready. These responses can help you navigate these moments with calmness, without needing to feel overwhelmed or caught off guard.
You don’t owe anyone an explanation about your body. Instead, you can simply acknowledge that you’re not interested in discussing it and redirect the conversation. Some examples from Kami Orange’s approach include:
These responses allow you to assert your boundaries without feeling the need to justify yourself.
Body comments, especially those that touch on things like weight or appearance, can stir up complex emotions. It’s easy to internalize them, feeling shame, frustration, or even confusion about how we should feel about our bodies. However, when we practice self-compassion, we remind ourselves that we don’t have to accept others’ opinions as truth.
Kami Orange often speaks about the importance of turning inward and reconnecting with our bodies, especially when we face outside judgments. Rather than internalizing comments that aren’t helpful, try these reminders:
This practice of self-compassion helps you stay grounded and maintain a sense of agency in the face of body comments.
When someone persists in commenting on your body, it can sometimes feel like they’re not respecting your boundaries. In these moments, it’s perfectly okay to steer the conversation toward a topic that feels more comfortable and positive.
Redirecting doesn’t mean avoiding the person or being rude; it simply means setting a new tone for the interaction. For example:
This approach helps you maintain control of the conversation and guides it toward a space where everyone can feel more comfortable.
Body comments are often rooted in societal conditioning or the speaker’s own insecurities. People may comment on your appearance based on their beliefs about health, beauty, or what they think is appropriate. But these beliefs are theirs to carry, not yours.
The key here is to detach from the comment itself. Their opinion doesn’t have to impact how you feel about yourself. Remembering this can make it easier to respond with kindness, even if the comment is uncomfortable. When you sense judgment or comparison, try reminding yourself:
This perspective helps you shift the focus back to your own sense of body trust, which is ultimately the most important thing.
If you’re feeling open to it, you might want to take the opportunity to gently educate the person making the comment. This isn’t about convincing them of anything, but rather sharing your perspective in a way that encourages understanding and respect.
Some responses might include:
Approaching the situation with kindness and patience can help create space for a more supportive dialogue, and it might even open up new perspectives for the other person.
If you’ve set your boundaries, redirected the conversation, and still feel uncomfortable, it may be time to step away. You are allowed to remove yourself from a conversation or environment that isn’t nurturing to your wellbeing.
Here are a few ways to excuse yourself with care:
Taking time to recharge or ground yourself is a powerful way to care for your mental and emotional health, especially if the situation feels too overwhelming.
As the holidays can bring up a wide range of emotions, don’t hesitate to lean on trusted friends, family, or a therapist if you need to process your feelings. Sharing your experience with someone who understands can help you release any tension or discomfort, and they can offer validation for your emotional responses.
Navigating body comments during the holidays can be challenging, but it’s important to remember that your worth isn’t tied to your appearance. You have the right to set boundaries, practice self-compassion, and create space for conversations that honor your feelings. With the guidance of body trust, you can move through these moments with confidence and peace, reminding yourself that your body is yours to love and care for — no matter what anyone else says.
This holiday season, protect your peace, trust your body, and remember that your worth transcends the opinions of others.
